Hotel Dramas

Location: Posh hotel, somewhere outside Southampton, about 180 miles from home.

Act 1 Scene 1

Room 343, somewhere on the 2nd floor.

Yours Truly (on the telephone): "Hello, my four year old has locked himself in the bathroom, would it be possible for someone to help get him out".

Receptionist: "Yes my dear, we'll have someone with you straight away!"



Act 1 Scene 2

Checking out at reception desk of posh hotel, crisis over!
Meanwhile, 21st C Dad has gone outside with the children to pack the car.

Receptionist: "I'm glad you enjoyed your stay, are you ready to hand over your room key?"

Yours Truly: "Ah yes, I'll just get it for you, my husband has got it"

(runs to car)

Yours Truly: "Darling husband, do you have the room key?"

21st C Dad: "No, I gave it to the boy who locked himself in the bathroom."

In disbelief, Yours Truly looks at the boy who locked himself in the bathroom. He appears to be empty handed.

Yours Truly: "Darling son, what have you done with the room key?"

Boy who locked himself in the bathroom: "I left it on the stairs!"

Yours Truly: "Which stairs?"

The family treks up, treks down, up the grand stairs, down the back ones, no key to be found, not a sausage, zilch, nothing.

A stranger passes in the grand hall. He looks over and smiles.

Stranger: "Are you looking for a key?"

I nod but how did he know it was us?

Stranger: "Panic over, I found it behind the chair in the corner."

Yours Truly: "A CHAIR?"

The Receptionist smiles.

We leave.




Act 1 Scene 3

Closing the hotel door behind me, I take a deep breath and sigh with relief that the boy who locked himself in the bathroom had been rescued and that the key he had lost had been found.

I gaze in his direction and shudder and gasp.

He is no longer empty handed.

His left hand may be empty.

But in his right hand...

...is another key.

It isn't a hotel key. Good grief, no!

THIS TIME IT'S THE KEY TO THE BLOODY CAR!

Your's Truly: "Oh hell!"